Thoughts on A Lazy Sunday

I am feeling so lazy today. I don't know why. I mean it is not like I need a reason to be lazy but I have this nagging feeling of laziness today and it is driving me crazy! It's not as if I have nothing to do. I have lots of stuffs to finish. Lots of worksheets to type and print out. Lots of written work to grade. Also, I have to send sms-es to remind the students not to be late tomorrow since they have their Stage 1 test. Actually most of them are mature and responsible adults (as one of them had unabashedly told me after I told them we can't watch any R21 films in class - haha), except for a few knuckleheads who I have to constantly remind not to be late.

To add to all the mayhem, my sis is busy packing now cos she is going to Brunei in two days time!! It is going to be a small scale school overseas trip of 26 students and 3 teachers. She is super excited cos it will be her first time away from us, to another country no less! As much as I am excited for her, I am worried as well. She is after all the baby of our family, a super pampered one too. I guess it is time I have to trust her to be more responsible for herself.

I still remember having tears in my eyes the first time I sent her to her first kindergarten class. She was waving me goodbye while queuing up with all her new classmates. I just have to turn away as I felt the tears trickled down. The tears came again when she graduated from kindergarten, on her first day in primary school, when she was on stage singing with her choir mates when she was in Primary 3 and in many more occasions. Up till now, I have no idea why I cried. I have the feeling that those tears will visit me again when I send her to school this Tuesday.

I know now why I am so reluctant to have children of my own in the future, not really cos of my age (which is rather old for child-bearing I must say... hehehe) but because I don't think I can ever go through another roller coaster of emotions of having one. Of course, I do like children but having a first hand experience in taking care of my sis, I came to realise that it is a lot of hard work and a heavy responsibility. I am not going to jeopardise my child's future if I think I am not able to provide a great mental, emotional, spiritual and financial environment for him/her to grow up in. Ultimately, I want my child to be able to contribute to society and not simply having one just to shut my parents or my future husband's parents up. However like all things in life, never say never right.

Anyways, I better get my gear up and running and start finishing my work for the whole of next week. I badly need a cup of tea now ... and two sets of triple decker sandwiches! *haha* I wish. Have a great week everyone, I am sure you will :).

P/s to all:

Ida - Start packing now gal!! *haha* You can always get the new handphone when you come back *heheh* Have a great trip and take lotsa pictures okies. Do remember to come back though :P Happy Advance Birthday to your daddy :)

Nuyul - How are you nuyul?!?! Where are you??! You are like below the radar for a very long time *hehhe*. Mish you lots!

Emnaz - Happy Advance 31st Birthday! May your life be forever blessed with wonderful people and equally wonderful gadgets *haha*. I'm sure you will have a great birthday celebration.

I guess that's about all the p/s-ing that I have cos besides the three of you, I have no idea who else reads this humble blog of mine *haha* So if you read my blog and you are not any of the above three mentioned, have a wonderful week ahead ya.

Tatz for now ......