Something To Share Part II .....

Here's another one .... Dunno why I am posting all these .. must be the time of the month *haiz*.......

Ps: As this is taken from the net directly, to go to the original site, Pls click on the title. Thanks :)

Two out of Three

Dear Trish,
I’ve been married before, and I know what I want in a partner emotionally, sexually and aesthetically. I’m in a relationship now with a woman who meets two of my three criteria. She is cute, but she doesn’t have the look I desire. I don’t have a lot of money right now to go out to clubs or other places to meet women, so I’m reluctant to discontinue this relationship and end up in an emotional desert. Is it OK to date her just for now?
- Two Out Of Three

Dear Two Out Of Three,
If you haven’t told her she doesn’t measure up to your aesthetic criteria, and that this romance is really just a filler affair for you until you meet a woman who does, aren’t you already conducting this relationship on barren and ultimately unpromising terrain? What can possibly grow here, except resentment?

You’re courting this woman in an emotional desert, and you’ve invited her to spiritually dehydrate by your side. Please, in the name of dating decency, let this woman drink down a cool, cleansing dose of truth — namely, that while you like her and enjoy spending time with her, she is ultimately not what you’re looking for in a long-term romantic partner. That’s half of the truth, certainly the easier half for her to hear.

I’m not sure how you tell a woman that the real reason you’re dating her is that you’re too busted to belly up to the dating table right now, and when that changes and you have enough cash to divvy up and get yourself back into the game, she’ll be history. I have to confess, I would love to be a fly on the wall during this conversation. Even dating experts have a thing or two left to learn.

While many of us were once faced with dashboard decisions similar to the one Meatloaf sang about long ago, we were younger when we made most of our notoriously poor choices, and we should know better today. Two out of three ain’t bad, but if we know we need all three in our love lives, it simply isn’t enough. She’s not the one for you, but you believe she’s better than the alternative. She has a right to know. You can’t slice, dice or justify it any other way.

A little honesty will either free you up to meet new women, give you the time to get a night job and bank your cash until you have enough to venture out into dating land, or allow both of you to enjoy dating each other within the limits of your expectations and desires. She may accept that she’s your Ms. Right Now rather than your Ms. Right. You may even learn that you’re only a Mr. Right Now for her, too. Do you know if you meet all her required qualities for a “keeper boyfriend?”

It may be time to do a reality check in terms of your dating criteria selection process. People, and the circumstances of their dating lives, change. You’re older than when you were last married, and money is obviously tight right now. Are your expectations in a girlfriend in line with what you have to offer? Since you mention that this woman is cute, I have to wonder how far from measuring up she really is? Be careful not to eliminate someone who has most of the criteria you’re seeking, and who happens to adore you for who you are, and certainly not for your money. People like this don’t often pass through our lives.

We surveyed married people and were surprised to learn that just under half of them felt that their spouses were not at all similar to the image they once held of an ideal spouse for them. In other words, while we may keep a long dating shopping list in our heads, or feel that we belong with a particular type of person, love happens in unique and unpredictable ways, if we let it. It would be a shame if people insisted that the image they held in their minds, and not the woman or man they held in their arms, was their real romantic destiny.

Ask Yourself This: Is your dating wish list – the qualities and attributes you insist your next romantic partner must possess – so restrictive that it’s holding you back from the real chances for romance and love that pass through your life?